… siMpLe tHouGht of -mEd’z- …

There’s something wrong i felt bout my work…

There’s something wrong i felt bout my look…

There’s something wrong i felt bout my feeling…

definitely a wrong day!!

This afternoon rici calls me..She was in her transitting during her way to Spain. I can’t met her at the airport this afternoon ‘cos my job..I really miss her since her leaving to work at East Timor a year ago..She shocked me with telling that she’s married already for a month..With spanish guy she ever told me before..I really supprised!! Never thought she’s gonna married that soon..She told that they met last year in East Timor when she was working there.

He was a UN Police for conflict area, when East Timor in their moment arranging their government.. Rici told me that, at first, his friend who was the one whose intended to get close to her..Hahaha, but Rici dump him coz he was too stingy.. last month her man came to Bali during rici’s holiday, and he purposed her (so sweet…)..

And damn, she shocked me right to the head!! And it wasn’t over, like an aftershock after an earthquake, she did it once again by told that she’s pregnant for 2 weeks..And she just realize it for recent days..I really happy to hear that.. But she told me that she probably having birth there..She might be back to Indonesia in next a year or two..I’m going to missing her..Missing how we was used to be..Moments on our senior high..She’s the place for me to complain, to talk, to laugh, and so on..

I remember to one night last year during my holiday at bali..She and her ex-man, also i, was having a great night..We were party all night long at a bar..It was the greatest number of cigarette i ever took in a night for whole my life! She’s one of my coolest mate to have smoke with..Hahaha! Rici and i went out by foot, go back to her exboyfriend’s hotel..And living him drunk at the bar..We took a walk down the kuta shore, talking about our each life, future plan, what we had did in time before, starring the sea, laugh, bare foot down the street..It was a cool night! Mmmpphh..Now she’ll be in Spain for undefinite time, wish she would find her happiness there with her new family..Happy Wedding dear..You’ll always gonna be my best pal i ever had..Come back here soon ok..I’ve got so much story to talk about..I’m going to missing you..May God bless you and your new family (also your future baby).

Regard’s Medi.

Couple days ago i had dine together with friends of mine. Quite long not seen them all..Such happy had time together, just like we was back at the college moment. Well, actually the gathering in mean of celebration of Pandu, Chika and I who had our birthday this month together. But not all of our friends came with. But that’s fine..We cool with that! As usual, we talk much ’bout things going on to each of us, what’s new, gossipping, and other stuff.. I really happy that night..After long time i didn’t have time to be with them. Feel so releasing everytime they around..Release me from my deppressed this days.. Thx guys..Really happy to have you all around me.

Wow, Ramadhan kali ini cukup berkesan utk gw..Many beautiful things happened to me thru this Ramadhan.
Salah satunya seperti yg terjadi pada awal2 Ramadhan, dimana gw cukup malas untuk mengerjakan Sholat Tarawih pada malam2nya..Sampai suatu hari gw dan salah seorang teman talking ’bout our Ramadhan when we were in our teenager’s moment. I reminded to a moment when i was in junior high..One Ramadhan, when i got my self really close to my religi tradition. Gw hampir gak pernah melewatkan every single of my night dg Sholat Tarawih di Masjid. Gw juga cukup sering untuk beribadah di Masjid saat itu. But everything’s change until today..I didn’t get my self close enough to God. Temanku itu jg bercerita bagaimana dia dekatnya dengan Masjid dulu semasa remajanya. Dia bilang “bulan ini saatnya Pahala di obral Med..So jangan disia-siain..Belum tentu tahun depan bisa”..Dan ternyata kata2 itu cukup menohok di otak dan mengganjal di hati..
since that night gw meniatkan diri untuk melakukan sedikit perubahan yg cukup berarti..I tried to not missed my every single night dg melakukan Sholat Tarawih..No matter how tired i was..Dan gw selalu berusaha untuk gak ninggalin Sholat 5 waktu (kec. untuk weekend yg sampai saat ini trus aja kebablasan bangun “siang” bangget ..). Beberapa teman dekat dikantor seperti Luthfi & Fachrul juga sering utk ngajak gw Sholat berjamaah di Masjid kantor setiap siang..Ternyata memang cukup menyenangkan..Beside to refresh my brain, gw jg bisa memilih utk kembali keruangan sambil mengunjungi teman2 kantor lainnya plus bertukar kabar (alias gossipping..Hehe..Tp bkn hal2 negatif loh! Joke only)..
Gw jg ngerasain Puasa kali ini lebih mudah untuk gw laksanain tiap harinya..Everything goes easly..I became more patient, a bit able to control my emotion, I tried to less complain also ’bout my life..dan gw rasa lebih bisa menghargai apa yang sudah gw dapat dan yang gw miliki selama ini..Perhaps that’s why i wouldn’t ask for more than what i already had..
And also my birthday..It was one of my precious moment i ever had this year..And it happened in this holy month..Feels like some of what i’ve dream about came to a real.
And those are only a few of happiness and bless i had thru this Ramadhan..When people was trying to find their Lailatul Qadar night, i already found it along my Ramadhan..And i believe it..
When someone said that he got nothing to had thru Ramadhan this year, too awful to be sorry..While you can get anything you want.
My Thank for people who already taught me to appriciate life, to greatful for what i had, to remind me that i hadn’t loose anything yet and to believe to chasse it before too long, to made me appreciating the time i’ve still got, and not to wasting every single moment i had in my life..Coz we never know will tomorrow come..And tried to less complaining to what you already had.

Recently i’m in enjoying gabrielle song called Rise…"Now I’m ready to rise again"…can you feel the power of its words. and i’m ready to believe in you again…after throughing many thing, i suddenly start to believe on my faith in you… again…

I was having a great night on my birthday dine with my friends at Zoe Cafe. Everything seems so perfect. it’s a trully wonderful day i had. start from the morning till end. we were having fun that night…light chats, jokes, gossipping, laugh and such.

Got some presents that night…from yudith, ratna, and couple friends…(one of them gave me a pink-army boxer!!! hahaha…damn cute!! hayyahhh!!! ). Heru brought me a birthday cake (so sweettt…, although i already told to never brought me a Birthday Cake…thx God they forget to asking whose gonna get my first cake!!!hahaha!!!). Christine and Bening gave me "Pepes" (a traditional meal that can be made of fillet fish, toffu or mushroom and covered with banana tree leaf and steamed till done) but when i opened it, what i found was 3 block of chocolate!!! (they know that i really like Chocolate )…It’s really nice to have people who loves you. feel so appreciated that night…the phone rings many time from friends to say some birthday wishes for me…rain was pouring down, give some romantic atmosphere, and we took spot in the corner headed to the traffic street scene…i really greatful for their present, although some are couldn’t made it coz some reasons…

Lovly  

9 October.

"I was seen Heaven on Earth…But Today i felt Heaven on Earth.
It almost complete…before you’ve made it perfect."

Everything so beautiful. The heart beatting faster and i couldn’t think any better. I never thought you would do me this way…and there was no words came to say. It’s a trully sweetest thing ever done to me…and i couldn’t ask for more. I’m glad you were there.

Thank You.

waw….what a beautiful morning…so touching…

Started with hearing my name on the radio with a song followed "Andity - Semenjak ada Dirimu" (thx ka’ Catur…u’re the one!!) b4 i went to the office…never been like that before…birthday wishes from all my office mate (so touched!!)…a beautiful birthday card from my work-friends (you should seen this!!) with my Head Bureau name and his wishes on it…

may be i’ll pass the ritual of morning wishes…to many candles had blown, to many wishes had spelled…i’m going to let all flown by the way it should be…i don’t want to asking too much, i don’t want to expecting over, i don’t want hoping despertly, and i don’t want dreaming what i should not…or what i will never had. i’m going to let my friends do it for me…

another thing that made me smile this morning was, a short wish from my friend - Agung…"y 4JJI  semoga medio tambah cakep dan jadi lebih ideal…so, dia g perlu buang2 banyak uang utk treatment2nya…jadi uangnya bs buat nraktir saya y 4JJI…jadikanlah medio orang yang baik…sering ngajak jalan2 saya  y 4JJI…" … amien.

it was all almost complete me this day!!! almost… 

I can’t believe i’m 24!! Where the hell i’ve been.. Such a lonly guy who has a bunch people called "Friends"..Are they my friends? A trully one for me? Still in doubt to answer this quick.. Many said, "so..What do you want for your birthday present Medi..?". At first i don’t even know what i wanted..But recently, i really in wanting a ring! Enggagement ring! Hahaha..Some said "did you have the mate?"..And i said "no, i haven’t yet..That’s why i’m asking one …". Mmm..I guess i want a ring this year..But it’s just a wish.. They are who asked me what i want..Not me!

This afternoon, one of my friend told me “that’s true..Nothin in this world that last forever..” after listening to Maroon 5 song tittled Nothing Last Forever. At the first i thought i was agree with him..But this night, when i lay down in my bed alone, i try to reconsidering ’bout that thought..And i become disagree when i reminded to something i’ve been struggle with..A thing called “Love”.
I ever fell to a trully Love couple times..And still, it all last until today (include the love that i have for you). The thing that may decrease only the intensity of each Love that i ever felt..But it wouldn’t miss a singel of it, the Love i ever felt before to each people whose already took a place in my heart before. The feeling of it all will last forever in my heart either in my head..No matter how many Love i ever had, i may felt or either may come along my journey..Once it took a place in me, it will last forever in me..
I reminded to one of my friend’s thought that i ever wrote down here before..When she told about, no matter how her boyfriend hurted her bad..The joy he brought to her before was undeniable..It obviously clear, the love she had last until today..But it change into a different form not as same as before, and the intensity was decrease..But it last..
Same as i do..For some Love i ever had, i still felt it inside..And im sure it’ll last and live along with my life.
I hope this Love that i have for you will last forever too..And i know it will
The most precisious moment in my life was when i couldn’t have any reason to not falling in love with you..To my disability to reject this feeling you’ve already brought..To every moment i passed with you beside..
People may forget the Love they had easly..For me, i believe that wasn’t a Love they felt..It only a passion..Or perhap lust..Or maybe in their feeling of needing other either needed. It wouldn’t last! Even give them some remains..
That’s why now i believe that is something that may last forever..And it called “Love”.